Why you should Travel With your Partner Before Settling Down Together!

The last one year has not been a very easy year. Waking up every morning with new wedding pictures all over my social media feed is a scary feeling! I am very happy for my friends who have gotten married in the last one year but I am still not there where I see myself getting married.

But I am moving there eventually and I couldn't be happier about that journey! I am glad that this journey is happening at its own pace.

No matter how vague the topic might seem, it is super important to know your partner better before you decide to say "I do" and travelling together is definitely one of the better ways to know that. This, of course, is applicable if and only if you support the idea of travelling at all. There are certain people who like to travel. Then there are people who are completely travel-enthusiast and then there are people who don't really get excited by the idea of travelling and would rather sit in the comfort of their homes.

These are completely personal choices - which is fine. If you belong to the first two categories, this post might excite you. If you belong to the third category, I am more than interested in knowing your ways of getting to know your partner!

I happen to be one of those girls who likes to explore places every now and then and gets mildly to averagely excited to the idea of travelling. And I happened to meet this guy who always has one bag ready to travel anytime, anywhere. So, for us, travelling together is not a very vague idea at all.

               


Had I been a part of a more liberal family, I would have definitely gone for living in together before settling down and would have been writing about why one should (or should not) live in before getting married. Living in together definitely speeds up the process of knowing each other. I think travelling together is a better alternative to living together in its own ways. Plus I was in no mood of spending another chunk of my life in short dates to solve the purpose of getting to know each other. When I say "getting to know each other", what exactly do I mean?




It is certainly way more than just about being intimate. In fact, that doesn't even make it to my list!

I mean the following, which I learned after travelling with him for both short and long trips!

Dealing with unforeseen situations (and each other!)

The real test is exactly when both of you move out of your comfort zones. The rosy picture final turns into what being with someone actually means! No trip is free from some kind of mishap - running late for conveyance, losing your luggage, getting incorrect or no reservations - and it is the best time when you get to know a person's stress handling capabilities and tolerance level!

I am not saying that travelling together can make or break a relationship but it certainly makes it easier for you to make your decision.


Art of compromise

There are too many things you encounter when you are with someone, out of your comfort zone, probably to a relatively newer place, where you don't know a lot of things and a lot of people. There is going to be those times when you will have two completely opposite things to chose from and you wouldn't really know what to do. You will then realize that how adjusting the other person is. Moreover, you will also get to know if you are ready to make compromises for this person - is he/she worth? Just kidding but I am sure you get the gist!

I am a complete morning person and he happens to be typically party-all-night kind of a guy. I prefer catching the sunrise of every place I go to and he has his priorities set of exploring the nightlife of every place he goes to. He even dug out this all night party place amidst the mountains in Kasauli. *sigh* Well, we both chalked our way out by adjusting ourselves a li'l bit. I know he is worth some sleepless nights and he knows I am worth those sunrises!

He usually gets up for the sunrise and take those wonderful shots for me! 


I don't find it annoying if I have spend a night or two with a li'l less sleep than usual!


Attitude towards each other

Continuing with the above point, you tend to develop a deeper understanding of each other. Your attitude towards each other starts shaping up once you have travelled together. I respect him more now!


Habits

Travelling brings out one's true self. And there are certain habits about each other about which you get to know early in a relationship. And that is a great thing to happen. Go for a trip soon and save yourself from some complaining in later stages of life!

I got to know that this guy loves to sleep. And I am not the one who would sleep on a trip. He is slowly adjusting to this fact and he tries to sleep less on trips. And for the time being, I figure out the activities which I can do alone (which are less enticing for him) while he sleeps. See, we both are adjusting and it is fun!

Talk about perspective

This is perhaps the most beautiful thing about travelling together. Nothing brings a couple closer than sharing their varied perspectives about different things in life and a trip away from the daily life is the best time to do that! And these things are pretty important to know about your partner before marrying him/her. Better be careful than be sorry!

And we have had our talks over our favourite beverages. He is a chai  person and I don't like tea at all!

We are two different people, if not completely opposite. And knowing about these persepectives has helped us evolve more as individuals in this relationship.

Money matters
Another thing for which a couple trip is always good is the way you budget things. Usually, the first trip is not the best for judging this because you tend to splurge more. However, how you budget the various aspects of the trip, how you spend and how you prioritize the spending is something which gives you a clear picture of how your partner manages his finances and if that is something you are okay with and would want to adjust to.

We both splurge on experiences that are worth. But yes, we splurge and we know it!

You get to know if you are a good team (or not!)

My blog, my say. So, I have to boast that we are a great team. And for any successful alliance, it is always important to be a good team. Of course, only one of you cannot be driving the relationship. How you work out your travel itinerary keeping in mind the common interests, how you plan your internal travel and how you both keep your calm while doing all of this determines the level of understanding you have as a team. And it is a good feeling, isn't it?

We are a great team together!

Finally, if you love to travel then the person you marry should be your favourite travel companion

If you know you love to travel and would want to spend a lot of time doing that then it is important that your forever companion is your favourite travel companion also! I have made some fun memories with this guy and would want to do that for the rest of my life with him. And travelling with him brought me closer to this decision.

And you will be glad that you have some great memories of your travel with your favourite travel companion!


'Tripping' during your courtship is fun. Also, it saves a lot of time when it comes to the planning of your trip because you know what you have to include and exclude, well in advance. It also gives you a rough picture of all the things that need to be worked out, things for which you are okay adjusting and also let your partner know what are things which are completely essential for you.

Or are you one of those who met your significant other while travelling? I am sure you must agree with me. Tell me your story, please? I find the idea too amazing!

36 comments :

  1. Indeed travelling can reveal a lot about compatibility, habits and personality of the would-be partner. I am glad my partner loves to travel and his desire to travel made him my forever team mate :-)

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    1. I am so glad and happy to hear this! :)

      Thank you so much for your kind words!

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  2. Good points. I don't have a partner but I agree that traveling is a good way to see what your partner is like especially since travel is a priority for me.

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    1. Yes, Ann!

      For people like you who are enthusiastic about travelling, I guess few long or short trips really help in nurturing a relationship!

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  3. YES YES YES!!!! This is so so true. I wrote an article a while ago on how to build your relationship while you travel and it touched on a lot of these points too. So many people say traveling ruins your relationship, but if it does then the relationship wouldn't have been strong enough to survive in the real world anyways (in my opinion). Loved this piece!

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    1. True!

      Travelling is a real test of any relationship. Thank you so much :)

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  4. You are so right about learning to compromise when you travel with your partner! My husband and I have completely different travel styles (I'm a huge planner, he's more relaxed) so we end up compromising almost everything. Except food! That's one thing we agree on haha

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    1. Kristin, that is a perpetual problems with males! They relax way too much :D

      Thanks for dropping by :)

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  5. Spot on when mentioning budgets, it is so important and really can be make or break, with partners or friends. I'm currently travelling with my husband (oops we did it the wrong way round, got married first) and we agree we should not spend to much, but it really differs what we are prepared to spend money on, it's funny!

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    1. Tanya, the basic idea is to enjoy with your partner while travelling! I am glad you are doing it, with or without marriage :D

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  6. I so agree with all of this! Even related to friendships- there are some friends I love who I know I can't travel with, and others who make the best travel buddies!

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    1. Nichole! Yes, I never thought like that! A=And I guess we bond better with our travel buddies!

      Thanks for your visit! :)

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  7. Great post, I agree ....traveling together would certainly help you know if you can spend eternity together...lovely !

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    1. Thank you so much for dropping by and appreciating :)

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  8. These seem like really helpful suggestions. Certainly something can always go wrong when traveling and it is important to be able to compromise. I thought it was interesting to see that you are a morning person and your guy is a night owl! I'm glad you've worked that out!

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    1. Not just that, there are a lot of things that we have worked out and all of that because we decided to travel together :)

      Thank you for dropping by! :)

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  9. Traveling with someone will really help you get to know someone for sure! Glad you worked out the morning and night situation cuz that's a tough one :)

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    1. Heheheh! Thanks :)

      I hope all the other things work out too! :)

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  10. Totally agree with this. It's important for the couple to know each other and adjust under these circumstances before taking final decisions instead of forcibly tying the two together without any knowledge of how the two are in regular circumstances.

    Wish more people read this... Will do my bit by sharing

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    1. Thanks Doc! I have learned it the hard way that how important it is to know someone well, before hand. And no one else knows it better than you too..

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  11. You are so right about traveling with your partner before settling down! Much like building Ikea furniture together, traveling challenges you and can revel how you will work together in uncertain situations and handle pressure. Not to much being together 24/7! Great post :)

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  12. Traveling together does test your relationship in new ways! It's all about compromise and in my case, my boyfriend and I always agree on food :)

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  13. Dude!! I love all the pictures. Lovely post!! Keep going girl :)

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    1. Thank you so much Kajal! :D

      You know it means a lot when it comes from people who matter! :)

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  14. Enjoyed reading this post and it makes sense.
    I met my husband close to 12 years ago and that time we were both new in Bangalore. I was 3 months more acquainted with the city than him so while we did not travel out together, we explored Bangalore a lot on his bike. Now we are still on road trips.
    I also feel that travelling has really caught up over the last decade. Before that, couples in love would spend hours talking at a coffee shot or then there were text msgs for the shy ones ;)

    happiness and food

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    1. Hey Parul! Thank you for dropping by! :)

      I have had my share of shy messages and chats over a cup of coffee. And none of that worked out well for me! That is why I thought my last shot should be fool proof ;)

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  15. What an awesome post :* <3 Every single point is relatable and i hope those adjustments keep on continuing ;)

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  16. Lovely post Sush! Travel certainly gets two people Bond better. How else would you know about someone else's eating and pooping habits ��

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    1. Exactly Suruchi! And hey, thanks. I did not know you read my blog! :D

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  17. I just happen to read your article randomly..You're so cool and I agree every word you said..But unfortunately our conservative,oppressive Indian society disgrees such things..I feel It's the best way for 2 individual to know each other..I have heard of couples breaking up in first night , honeymoon night due to incompatibilty..Parents only match wealth,looks, profession , horoscopes,but it's upto couples to find out whether they're compatible For that many need time,which these
    familes are not ready to provide...Butt if such trips are planned in advance,we can help to prevent such unnecessary hookups and breakups with the wrong person..Always remember it takes a lot of guts to remain unique and single in a society which settles for anybody they come across..And I appreciate your uniqueness.You will get someone special at the right time..Be patient..

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    1. Hey Prianka!

      Yes, the society is too conservative and sadly, it's become regressive day by day! Travelling with your partner - knowing him or her before hand in every aspect is very important for any couple. Thanks for dropping by :)

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  18. I totally agree that there's so much one gets to learn from travelling with our partners before marriage. While its good if both are honest to each other, it could be a challenge if both the partners try to look and act the best just to please each other for the few days they are together but they are actually different people when they are apart.

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    1. Yes, agreed! That is why I recommend ample number of trips! Also, you should never judge by the first trip - it's usually the honeymoon trip with both of them trying to impress each other and overlooking the things that matter!

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