'I do' anyway, it doesn't matter. - Sushmita Malakar Blog

Thursday, August 30, 2012

'I do' anyway, it doesn't matter.

Love versus arranged marriages. The word that makes sense here is only 'marriage'. Marriage is, if I put it simply, an unification of two different people as husband and wife. There is, of course, a lot more to it.

The process of marriage can be divided into different stages. The most important one is to find the correct partner. It can be either you who finds it or your parents. Then you get to know each other and then finally you get married. So according to this, the process of finding the right person determines whether the marriage is going to be loved or arranged.Why do we make such a big deal out of adjectives used to describe a marriage? Is it just because the newer generation has always wanted to outrun the older one in ethics and values that are supposedly not-so-cool? Or is it because of the uncontrollable emotion called love?

The obvious answer is - love. But that is not the case, always. Go out and ask any youngster about his preference for a marriage, he might not even know the meaning of the word 'marriage', but he won't take a single second to say 'love marriage'. When you say love marriage, you always start thinking in just one direction-I have to find the person to fall in love with before my parents find me the one. So what difference does it exactly make? Ultimately you are falling in love, right?

So did the above paragraphs give you an idea that I'm pro- arranged marriages? If yes, then you are wrong. I still don't have a say in this matter. Its is totally a person's choice whether to fall in love before his or her family arranges the cupid's strike.

But of course, we live in a society that has achieved a different level of double standards. That is probably the sole reason why love marriages a such a big deal here. We worship lord Shiva and Parvati and they never had an arranged marriage. Falling in love is not a sin, lord Krishna fell in love too. And we worship him and his romantic partner, not is wife. But yes, if someone else does it, it is sinfully wrong, why? If it was unethical, they would not have done that at the first place.

If you ask me, love or arranged, both these words are a hokum. All is well that ends well, so no matter what path you take, if you are happy today, you know you were right.

2 comments:

Nirvana said...

So agree with you .... whenever people say that love marriages are the influence of the west, I give the same examples you have given!!

http://lafemmenirvana.blogspot.in/2012/08/love-and-marriage-chicken-and-egg.html

Rose said...

Hey Nirvana! I know that totally. It's like it is always easy to blame someone else rather than looking into one's self. Thanks for stopping by! :)